Finishing a 'masterpiece' and other uninteresting personal tangents.

I don't feel I will ever be able to write another great story again. There of course lies the problem in being consumed by the process of creating a good piece. I get so into the story that I live and breathe every word and sentence. When I come up for air I am rattled by the fact that I may have reached a pinnacle. Even though I know that this is not the case. At this point in time I'm still just some chump prattling away on his keyboard that nobody has ever heard of before.

By nobody, even as a regular person a lot of people haven't heard of me. Some of the old comrades in high school were Brad who-ing me even after 6 years together. I swear I have been introduced to this one guy at university about 5 times. He always seems to forget my name. Even though we sat together for an entire semester and I shared some of my witticisms. I think I have one of those faces too. I often get confused for other people. For 18 months at a previous job I got called 'Ben' by some of the folks. Even after correcting them after every time and the fact that the badge hanging from my front pocket said 'Brad'. Those were the biggest clues one should take that my name is not Ben.

I have so many ideas in my head, I need to be able to let a few go every now and again. Even if they don't live up to my expectations, at least it will be one less idea buggering my brain hole to be set free. Often they never do, the way of things is that they exceed or go under or are exactly expected (which is almost never the case). Everything I write turns different to my original vision. Not entirely though. I will establish a voice at the beginning and try to keep it consistent throughout the prose unless some story development dictates I should alter it. What happens afterward is that especially with the short stories I've wrote I will write to a goal. Keeping in mind some of the points I have to hit along the way.

The latest short story I polished. Let's call it 'The Release' which was the working title up until I decided it was too generic. I wrote it at the start of April and finished it completely earlier today. The first draft of the piece was written in about 4 hours. After I had hit the end I wanted, I went over and read it quite a few times tweeking it along the way.

The major edit which lead beyond the vague line between draft numbers with computers came along after laying down some goals to improve it. Mainly prose and dialogue. I filled in holes and inserted everything I thought was needed to get to the end. So the 2nd draft was basically expansionary.

In the '3rd' draft which I will call completely over last night and this morning. I printed out the document and went to town with a highlighter and pen. Chopping out all the fat in the story, making sure I was spot on with tense, grammar and spelling. I often found ways of streamlining the prose to say whats needed in an efficient way. I ended up with a 5% reduction on a 3000 word story.

I went into such detail I would usual just gleem over and not notice. That after multiple corrections and multiple crumpled and reprinted pages, finding a comma instead of a fullstop is almost enough for me to start biting my fingers until they're white. Overall I am extremely happy with the outcome. I think it's the best serious short story that I have written. It's lean, mean and has a good forward thrust for plot. As always I aim for originality, for things I haven't seen or read before.

It's the first one in the goal this year of 5 short story submissions. That is five different stories, not the same one to five different places. Submitting to either competitions or magazines.

I've got this one packed and ready to post Monday morning. I'm sending it off to a competition that has more of a literary flare, so I've kept that in mind while writing this. The Release gleems the boundaries that separate genre writing to literary. It contains a spirituality, an almost supernatural element. I felt it important to drop hints that there is both a 'real' and a supernatural interpretation of how events unfold. So the pessimists and pretentious that are literary folk can be satisfied. While I can sneak a speculative piece into their hands.

The second short story I wrote last month has to go through at least a few more passes. It's humorous, some folk who I palmed it off to to read have literally laughed out loud. So I take it as a good sign. I know I can still improve on it, and bring it up to a really professional level. I may film flam around a bit at the start while I was finding my footing. The end is pretty neat already. I have my eye on an Australian magazine that it could fit in with. Surprisingly this doesn't contain much in terms of speculative fiction. More fun nonsense. I was about to work on this when I had the 'I can't write' niggles so I decided to write a blog post instead.

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V: Anna and Chad.

As I am an Australian TV shows from the states often take a bit of time to reach our screens. While in recent times networks have been pushing forward the newest shows alot more so than even five years ago. Under the guise of such catchy words as 'Fasttracked' and 'Streamlined'. The remake(reimagining in exec speak) of the 1980's tv series 'V' finally premiered last Sunday after a few months of its US premiere.

My first impressions were that this was an entertaining science fiction show. It sure has been geared to reap in whatever audience is attached to sci-fi veterans. Morena Baccarin(Firefly, Stargate SG-1), Elizabeth Mitchell (Lost), Joel Gretsch(Taken, The 4400) all star in V and have been in TV shows that have cult followings. The first episode also guest stars Alan Tudyk from Firefly fame. The special effects have that multimillion dollar shine. Having not seen the iconic original series my instincts are that the earlier episodes will feel better after the series has finished.



What I really want to focus on is one exchange which I thought summed up the first episode and the direction of the series beautifully.

Anna the Visitor or V is walking through a sea of reporters. She is thrown all sorts of curly questions which are only met with her calm controlled demeanor.
Chad Decker (Scott Wolf) is a local journalists who hosts his own news program. He manages to silence the crowd.

Chad Decker: Is there such a thing as an ugly Visitor? You all seem to be what we consider attractive.

Anna: Thank you. You're not so bad yourself.

At this point in time much of the world has accepted that the V's are friendly. They have dished out advanced medicines and healed that which cannot be healed. Such as paralysis. The public mood toward them is overwhelmingly positive.

Chad's dialogue can be taken at least two ways.

1. I find you all hot.
2. Why are you trying so hard to appear friendly to us? What are you hiding? (How am I suppose to score with a V if I cant make friends with a slightly ugly, obese relative?)

The interpretation of what he had said plays a large part in why Anna later chooses him to interview her. Her interpretation is that he was implying 1. Which raises the question, have the V's underestimated the human race?
On the flipside, this is the first evidence that the V's are not perfect. Anna misinterpreted Chads meaning. So there may be a way to ultimately defeat them, if that is the direction the series will take.

I just appreciate the cleverness of the exchange. Also the dynamic it creates when Anna and Chad are together on screen for the interview. Her arrogance and belief Chad is a journalist with lightweight questions may be the undoing of their public goodwill.

Tt is shown more bluntly that the V's are not the benevolent beings they claim when they storm a super secret meeting guerilla style and only leave four survivors. Even so, that exchange between Anna and Chad remains my favourite scene in the Premiere.

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Why Avatar was predictable.

Let me say this straight of the bat. Avatar was a very good movie to see at the cinemas. That being said I want to go through a few of the reasons why I thought the actual story of the film was predictable. I could easily do the same thing about Why Avatar was awesome.

I saw Avatar about a month ago now and in that time its showed no signs of slowing down at the box office. It has now spent 5 consecutive weeks at the top of the US with similar results mirrored across the markets. Even new debut blockbusters such as Sherlock Holmes and the Book of Eli couldn't topple Avatar of its nice little cash cow. It's the movie that everyone must see, its also one of the hottest topics going around. Critics and moviegoers alike have praised its stunning special effects while criticising its at times cliche characters and predictable storyline. I tend to agree with this.

If you have yet to see it, beyond this point will contain spoilers for the entire movie.

Even before going into see the movie everybody seemed to know at least one or two things about the story of Avatar. Its about blue aliens and its about humans taking down those aliens. It's a story about the everyman hero Jake Sully who via the Avatar program he links with a na'vi-human hybrid and infultrates and befriends a local tribe on the moon of Pandora. The tribe so happens to be sitting on a vast deposit of a rare metal that goes for $20 million a kilo. The na'vi want to keep it, the humans want to have their slice. Cue conflict.


At the very heart of the story is the Hero's Journey. It's used over and over again throughout a great many stories. I think its present in Avatar in one of its most basic forms. Where the inexperienced hero, Jake Sully, is given the opportunity of a lifetime to participate in the Avatar program as his twin brother who had trained for years for the program dies. At the very beginning of the story Jake signs up with no idea what to expect. He is a fish out of water, but we have seen the familiar story so many times before that you just know he is going to end up outshining everyone and becoming the ultimate hero of the day. This trope is particular used often in science ficiton and fantasy. (Frodo, Lord of the Rings. Harry Potter. Spiderman. Neo, The Matrix. Rand Al'Thor, Wheel of Time...)

I love Hero's Journey type stories, its often how they are executed that really matters. Really it can either go two ways, the hero wins or the hero fails. Most of the time especially in blockbuster hollywood movies the hero will win.

Prediction: Jake Sully would save the day.
Result: Jake Sully saves the day.

The question was how at this stage, which can be pieced together quite easily as you keep watching the movie.

In addition to the Hero's Journey we have a David v Goliath situation. Where the big bad guys have all the resources and have overwhelming favourable odds to do away with the little guys (Na'vi). There is an implicit promise within a tale like this that the small guy will be able to through an epic struggle defeat the big guys (Humans). To put it simply that is exactly what happens.

Using this makes the victory all the more satisfying in the end. Whats the fun in seeing the story from the big guys perspective and having the big guys win? Thats why David v Goliath adds to the hero's journey. Seen in Lord of the Rings (Mordor v the rest of Middle Earth/mostly men), Mistborn (Small gang pulls of a heist to topple the long in power Lord Ruler), Gladiator (Maximus defies the Empire), Firefly (Independents v Alliance, Mal's crew v the Alliance)

Prediction: Na'vi beat the Humans.
Result: Na'vi beat the Humans.

The next one is more a case of clearly stated motives that don't change rather than predictability. But it adds to the sense that I can see whats happening. The bad guys are ruthless, they will Stop at nothing to destroy the na'vi if they don't move. We know that the humans want whats under the big tree. There are no real hidden agendas from the bad guys, no suprising tricks. The bad guys want to destroy the na'vi and they would rather use force.

Prediction: Humans unload a can of whoopass on the Na'vi.
Result: Their Home Tree is annihilated. They keep attacking.


Im going to tie a couple of points together on this one. Jake Sully ends up being the Chosen One which is often used with the Hero's Journey. Many times what sets the hero apart and is perceived as possibly a weakness in the beginning is the very strength that's needed to become the Chosen One(Avatar specific jargon is used for the 'Chosen One'). In Jakes case im going to say that it was a simple mind and big heart that got him through in the end. Not all chosen ones have to have this, but there is usually some predetermined set of criteria or trials to complete that will determine the Chosen One. (eg. Neo, King Arthur, Jeffrey Sinclair - Babylon 5, many examples in children's fantasy.)

The first promise that he could be something special to the Na'vi comes with the flowers graviating and sticking to his skin. It is said to be the Eywa's doing. And earlier when one lands on the tip of Neytiri's arrowhead. You know something is going to happen, but questions of whether he is or isnt are always played with.

Prediction: Jake Sully chosen one.
Result: Jake Sully chosen one.

What plays into the Chosen One trope really obviously is the heavy handed foreshadowing. The one major example I have in mind is during the first Leonopteryx sequence. Which is the giant aggressive pterodactyl beast. When Neytiri spells out that only the ____(Chosen One) can tame that beast. (Wink, Wink, BIG HINT.) I wonder if Jake Sully is ever going to tame it? (Yes, yes he does.)

Prediction: Jake Sully tames the Leonopteryx.
Result: Jake Sully tames the Leonopteryx.

From the very start you get the feeling that as long as Jake Sully has one foot in both the Human and Na'vi camps he won't fully belong to either. The question was constantly in the back of my mind when watching it. I believe there was a promise that Jake would ultimately find a way to be a full time Na'vi.

My feelings were confirmed when Grace is on the brink of death and below that funky tree they attempt to fully transfer her mind to the healthy Na'vi body. To me this was writing on the wall in capital letters. JAKE WILL USE THIS.

Prediction: Jake transfers his mind to the Na'vi body permanently.
Result: He does in the final scene.


So that covers the main plot in the movie. The Jake-Neytiri subplot was also very predictable, I didnt get much of a will-they wont-they vibe from the two. In fact the romantic portion of the movie plays out very much like a romcom.



A really big trope I have seen practically word for word previously is the Chief's Daughter. Where Neytiri happens to be the daughter of the pseudo king and queen of the tribe. This trope fits into the broader trope of the poor boy winning the princess. (Aladdin, Titanic)
But if you really are looking for a case of de ja vu, take a gander at the season 1 episode of Farscape Jerimiah Crichton. There is the chiefs daughter (Neytiri/Lishala) who has feelings for the lovable rogue (Jake Sully/John Crichton) but tensions are a brewing when the chiefs daughter is already betrothed to an arrogant warrior who is an already accepted leader with his people. ( Tsu'tey/Rokon). The end result is ultimately different from the episode. In Farscape Crichton continues on his way to other adventures. In Avatar they have chemistry, they love eachother, they will be together despite the boundaries.

Prediction: Jake and Neytiri sittin' in a tree...
Result: k-i-s-s-i-n-g. (for starters)

A favourite of the romcom genre is the Double Double agent. One party originally had motives that the other party finds morally unforgivable. Somewhere along the story the hero will decide that he loves the other, and the original motive is no longer the primary motive but it's love.

The love interest will eventually find out about the secret, the hero may have already had an opportunity to come clean - they wanted to - but missed the opportunity and it then blows up in their face. But after the heat dies down, the hero may reason or the other party may find out from a third party the hero is the real deal. In the end this is just a speed bump in the road to happiness.

This trope works, people like to see it much like the Hero's Journey. So it is used over and over again with Avatar no exception.

Jake gets a chance to learn within the tribe itself. The military leader wants his hands greased with information on the Na'vi. Sully obliges with kudos in the beginning. He then falls in love with Neytiri, his tips become slimmer in content. But he is sadly unable to tell Neytiri the truth before his secret literally blows up in his face with Home Tree's destruction helped along by Sully's intel.

I think I got the amount of doubles right. Poses as Na'vi(double), then Poses as someone who poses as a Na'vi(double double).


A large factor I believe that plays into the predictability of the story has nothing to do with the story itself. It's the giant reported $150 million marketing campaign that seeped Avatar into the minds of the world.

James Camerons ten year return to directing, his pioneering camera technology were present years before its actual release. People were already excited to know more, so they got a hold of every scrap of info they could.

In the months before its release, trailers were released, there were tonnes of newspaper articles. The media coverage was huge compared to other movies, even against such films as New Moon the original story of Avatar has held its own for attention.

All of this means that people were very familiar with the story early on. The trailer eludes heavily to the actual story itself. The trailers of course are to wet your appetite, spoilers or not the producers want bums on seats. And they did.

Maybe I would of been singing a different tune if I had have seen it completely cold. It may not have seemed as predictable, but it wouldn't change the fact some common tropes exist within Avatar.

The marketing campaign could also have been a contributing cause to the presense of a tall poppy syndrome (A poppy gets to tall, people need to cut it down). The movie was massive before it was even release, with that much hype surrounding the movie before it had been proven. People will look for reasons for fault an otherwise brilliant movie. If they are looking for flaws, the audience will be criticing instead of emercing themselves in the movie. Knowing too much before hand and having the hype hinders ones ability for suspension of disbelief in a story. If you don't believe then all there is, is a sequence of storytelling techniques played out on screen.

Avatar was predictable. At the same time it was one of the most original, breathtaking new movies to come along this year. Sometimes to make a successful story a mix of the old and new is needed. The setting was very original, but they told a story that was familiar to the audience already. A groundbreaking unique story may have alienated some of the broad target audience. Instead they told a story that already appeals to everyone. Avatar may not have been as successful without it.

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